Last night I cried. It was a pathetic attempt- I couldn't let it take me to far down the rabbit hole because if I did- I'd heave.
Drama much? Dang. This week has knocked me down. I have always said I'd turn into a man when I get sick. All 'man flu like', but that was said in the confidence of having never actually been seriously sick in my life. Wait I remember having the sniffles back in my 1st yr at college when the floods took the power and my morale.
But mum, breathing tufts of love down the phone said she never rememberes me being this sick before. Temps of 38 and vertigo themed headache's had never ever been on my radar.
I remember one night this week, I thought my feet were dragged backwards and flinging me in circles like I was the saturday night lottery board.
But I really am blessed to be living with a Dr and a Nurse. We'll call this family the 'Incredibles'.
They last night welcomed me to the world of little blue and white pills. Antibiotics- you little pearls. And a beautiful prayer. There is something stunning about someone praying for you when you don't have the strength to do it yourself.
I can now see without having to squint one eye and tilt my head, I can smell.....(my sheets are in the wash because of this) and I can almost breathe deeply without feeling like I'm sucking life through a straw.
And I'm debt free. I wrote a list of goals and the one at the top of this yr- to be debt free by my birthday. I'm 8 days early.
2nd goal on the list- hasn't happened. But during one 3am wake-up call by God I was thinking that the only way to get me to start taking this goal seriously was if I got stopped in my tracks. If something dramatic happened.
And it seems like a week of debilitating headache's, special moments of kittens sleeping on me, episodes of nausea, interspersed with chapters of the disney favourite "Emperors new groove" might just be the drama I was needing.
Ugh what an awful thing to wish upon myself.
But I guess im looking for the Birds-eye view in a balloon full of helium.
(which incidently- you need to check this woman out- her byline on her blog is "I'd like to see into your dreams my little girl"- while her baby's sleeping, she sets a scene up and takes the picture. http://milasdaydreams.blogspot.com/ )